What Road to Travel?



When you have too many choices it is often really hard to pick the right one. The right one for you that is.

If you are anything like me then you are always full of ideas, and life is full of exiting options. But no matter how exciting it all is, it is also very tiring, because how are you going make a choice? It is so hard to pick one or two, because they all seem so good. It is almost like being on a highway with many bridges and crossings, and not being sure what road to travel.

I know all about that feeling. Thing is, that it clutters my mind, and often I can almost feel my mind to be overcrowded. I almost feel each thought, each idea fighting for attention.

I am so excited about all these options, but at the same time they also weigh on me. I sometimes feel that I should follow up and pursue each and everyone of them, because they are all so promising. It is very hard for me to let go of any of the ideas and options that I have.

That is frustrating because with so many choices it impossible to follow them all up. At times it so occupies my mind that instead of taking action on one choice, I kind of freeze and don't do anything at all. And it's not even that I am afraid of making the wrong choice, no, it is more that I am so super exited about all choices that I am unable to make the right choice.

On multiple occasions I let this drag on in my mind. I knew I had to do something about it, and I knew what to do, but I couldn't really let go of any of them. It's like going shopping for new clothes, and not being able to make up your mind and wanting to buy all. I think it has to do with the fear that I will be losing out if I make a choice.

I know that I should be very grateful for having the privileged of having so many choices. There are many people who don't have this. Today most of us are overwhelmed and blessed at the same time with the options we are presented with. I always have to think about my parents and my grandparents who didn't have all these choices. That was partly because there weren't as many options available, and also partly because there simply wasn't enough money to pursue possible options.

When I look for example at the choice of having a telephone, my kids have the choice of a fixed phone and/or a mobile phone and all sorts of different brands. I grew up the first 11 years of my life without a phone, and I am sure that when my parent finally got their first fixed phone, there wasn't really any choice. My parent's grandparent never had a phone at all, so for them there wasn't any choice; no choice of getting a phone or not, and no choice in getting what type or brand of phone.

So these modern times are filled with options and choices, so much even that it is often very hard to chose.

Psychologist Barry Schwartz, calls this "choice paralysis". When we have too many options, we are less likely to do anything at all, and surprisingly we will also be less satisfied with what option we chose to follow up.

When there are too many options, we can regret the roads that we have not taken, instead of truly focusing on the road that we did take.

Many owners of online shops understand that giving the customer too many options may result in the customer not buying at all. That's why when selling online, many website owners direct us to a landing page, where we only have the choice of simply buying or not buying. There will be no other choices or links.


When our mind is cluttered, that complexity leads to indecision, which then leads to stagnation. 


But when our mind is clear, then this simplicity leads to decision, which leads to action.



Recognizable? Do you also sometimes feel flooded with information, and options? Let me share with you how I navigate the crisscross of ideas in my head.


Here are my tips:

  • Become aware that you have a bucket full of choices. Sometimes life is so fast that you do not even realize that you have that many choices, and you clutter your mind without even realizing it.
  • Be grateful that you have that many choices. Some people do not have that.
  • Don't take the all or nothing approach. Doing one thing doesn't mean there is nothing else you could do or chose at a later point in time.
  • Sit down and write down all your choices or all that is going through your mind. That way you release your mind of trying to remember it all, and you can always refer back to what you have written down.
  • Calm down. Take three deep breaths in through your mouth and breath out through your mouth.
  • Now look at each choice at the time and notice how it makes you feel. Write down behind each choice how you feel about it on a scale from 1 to 10; 1 being very negative to 10 being euphorically positive.
  • This should give you a good indication of where to start, without being afraid that you may lose out or forget about other options. You have them all written down, so you can always go back and tackle the next option.

The tips above seem very simple, but trust me, they work every time again!


With Love,

Maxima Miller



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